Saturday, April 03, 2010

Kirk vs Vader

Darth Vader: Captain James T. Kirk, we meet at last. I'm glad you saw sense and decided to surrender.

Captain Kirk: When Scotty swings the Enterprise around Lord Vader, I'm going to blast you out of the stars. There'll be No surrender, just space dust.

Darth Vader: I find your lack of faith most disturbing.

Captain Kirk: Spare me the double talk Vader, when the Enterprise weapons take out your rebels, you won't have a prayer.

Darth Vader: I warn you Kirk, Don't play with the powers from the darkside. Any offensive strike made against my starship by your Starfleet militants would yield fruitless results against the most powerful force in the universe. Come join me Kirk! Together we will govern the stars and overthrow the swaggering despot Federation of Planets.

Captain Kirk: Ready with phasers Mr Spock?

Spock: Ready. He is quite mad is'nt he? Captain, I feel it necessary to point out the odds of the USS Enterprise surviving the firey deathrays of Lord Vader's star destroyer.

Captain Kirk: Damn it Spock!! Not now!! (Kirk thumps his fist on the communications console.)

Darth Vader: Listen to your man Kirk. Don't become too proud of the USS Enterprise's technological superiority, it will become your undoing Captain.

Captain Kirk: Don't try to frighten me with your warlock ways, Lord Vader. Your sad dedication to that darkside magic won't save you now. We've got phasers, photon torpedoes and a doomsday weapon.

Darth Vader: (Gasp) thats cheating!

Captain Kirk: Assimulate this Anakin!

Darth Vader: Aghh!!!! You dare to call me that!!!!!

Captain Kirk: (Thumps fist on communications console) Scotty I need warp power in two seconds or we're all dead. Spock launch the Genesis........Gasp..... I can't.... breathe.....raise ...shields......

How does it end?

Live Long and Prosper.


defined benefit plan said...

they are both great captains. very different from each other.

Spacerguy said...

It a short spoof I wrote between two supreme commanders demonstrating some cosmic rules of engagement. Darth Vader is the Empire's lawless enforcer and Captain Kirk is the United Federation of Planet's champion of galactic peace.

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