Monday, December 10, 2018


Star Trek is a thrilling adventure which began in 1966. Heres a list of Top Ten tongue twisting - Technobabbles which Star Trek actors use in films and the tv series. We usually see medical or engineering teasers unraveling aboard these federation starships. At least 10 technobabbles are going to melt your brain because we've had 13 Star Trek movies soon to be 14, with six tv shows or seven including the animated one. So lets boldly explore scientific phenomena where no trekkers have geeked out before.

Technobabble sounds so right only because the pseudo-scientific lingo conveys such a realistic meaning (which many actors dread) but really technobabble is good only because its full of baloney still..... Treknobabble works. Treknobabble is impressive. Lets face it, treknobabble gives fans enough Star Treknical sophistication to geek out with at Star Trek conventions because its fun!

Have you got enough Positronic analytical prowess to try out these tongue twister top ten technobabbles?

Here a taste:

10. SCOTTY: The emergency bypass control of the matter anti-matter integrator is fused. (ST TOS; That Which Survives)

Matter integrator..... duh what?


9. DATA: It seems to be a highly focused aperture in the space time continuum. Its energy signature matches that of the temporal fragments we observed earlier. However it is about 1.2 million times as intense. I believe this may be the origin of the temporal fragmentation. (Timescape: STTNG)

Understand any of that? I think I got lost after the  aperture thing.....


8. DATA: Are you using a polymer based neuro-relay to transmit the organic nerve impulses to the central processor of my positronic net? If that is the case, how have you solved the problem of increased signal degradation inherent to organic synthetic transfer.... (ST FIRST CONTACT)

7.LAFORGE:It uses trionic initiators in the warp coil . They have a reputation of strange side effects, especially when you start playing around with them.

DATA: There have been reports of warp bubbles and other subspace deformations.

LAFORGE: So, what if that's what happened? Not a warp bubble, but a subspace transistor funnel.
RIKER: Connecting two points through subspace?



6. DATA: Let us also assume he has initiated an tachyon pulse at the same coordinates in space in all three time periods. In that case, it is possible that the convergence of three tachyon pulses could've ruptured the subspace barrier and created an anti-time reaction.
LAFORGE: I see where you're going, Data. And because anti-time operates opposite the way normal time does, the effects would travel backwards through the space-time continuum.

5. RIKER: Mister Barclay. Everyone's still trying to figure out exactly how you did it.
BARCLAY: Well, it just occurred to me that I could set up a frequency harmonic between the deflector and the shield grid using the warp field generator as a power flow anti-attenuator, and that of course naturally created an amplification of the inherent energy output.
RIKER: Uh huh. I see that.

4.EMH MARK II: The Secondary gyrodyne relays and the propulsion field intermatrix have depolarized. STAT TREK VGR (MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE)

3. RIKER: Okay, Morta. The Enterprise computer system is controlled by three primary main processing cores cross-linked with a redundant melacortz ramistat and fourteen kiloquad interface modules. The core element is based on an FTL nanoprocessor with twenty five bilateral kelilactirals, with twenty of those units being slaved to the primary heisenfram terminal. Now you do know what a bilateral kelilactiral is?
MORTA: Well, of course I do, human. I am not stupid. (RASCALS)

Warning: Repeated viewing could trigger some kind of psychosis.
2. ARTURIS: ".....Its a simple matter of extracting the iconometric elements, and triaxilating a recursion matrix" ST VOYAGER (Hope and Fear)



DATA: Computer, establish a security code for access to all functions previously transferred to Bridge.
COMPUTER: Enter code.
DATA: One seven three four six seven three two one four seven six Charlie three two seven eight nine seven seven seven six four three Tango seven three two Victor seven three one one seven eight eight eight seven three two four seven six seven eight nine seven six four three seven six. Lock.
COMPUTER: Security code intact for all specified inquiries and orders.
DATA: Computer, initiate cascade sequence, accepting instructions from Commander Data en route. (STAR TREK TNG BROTHERS)

Ah ha, so my trekker friends, not all technobabble requires confusing big words - just a good ole positronic brain like Datas!

Which series gets your No1 vote for the best treknobabble?

1. Classic
2. TNG
3. Voyager
4. DS9
5. Enterprise
6. TAS
7. Discovery


Monday, December 03, 2018

Star Trek TNG "11001001"

Airdate: 1st February, 1988.
Stardate: 41365.9
Writers: Maurice Hurley, Robert Lewin.
Director: Paul Lynch
Season 1 episode 14

In Star Trek TNG "11001001" the USS Enterprise NCC 1701-D stops over at sleepy Starbase 74 for routine computer upgrades. Captain Picard meets two computer dependent aliens - Bynars. The species resemble the "big brained" Talosians from Star Trek TOS "The Cage" but are really women disguised in Michael Westmores asexual clothing and makeup. In any case these guys are entrusted with enhancing the software on the Federation's flagship.

We soon learn the alien computer geeks "10 and 01" have big computer problems on their own home-world. Solely reliant on computers for social and intellectual communication, they need the Enterprise computer-core to reboot Bynars mainframe - except for Wesley and Rikers initial observations, no-one had a clue. The fun begins when Riker is lured to the holodeck. Some say William T. Riker is Captain Kirk's TNG version, so its only right he'd fall for a sultry Goddess on the holodeck.

 The stunning brunette Minuet (Carolyn McCormick). She sparkled like the diamonds around her neck and dazzled Riker with her pearly whites. No-ordinary smile, a sophisticated programmed smile designed to sucker Riker in while the Enterprise was being hi-jacked! The plot thickens! Meanwhile a fake emergency (failure of the warpcore magnetic containment) has panicked and evacuated nearly all the crew, leaving Picard happily wandering onto the holodeck.

What planet was he on? Surely Rikers suspicions on the bridge was enough but once Minuet had him under her spell. Forget it. So Picard would rather destroy the Enterprise-D than let her fall into enemy hands. At least someones thinking straight. Further investigation reveals 4 tortured Bynars on the bridge. Theres a mind twister here, what would you do? Tick, tock.... 4mins 58sec encounting....

Would Data really forget to check if Picard and Riker had left the ship for Starbase 74?
Finally Riker comments to Picard, Minuet will be hard to forget, despite running the Holodeck Programme, she never said goodbye. Parting is such sweet cold sorrow is it not? Would you pine over Minuet, a computer hologram?

 Live Long and Prosper, trekkers!
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