Too Much Trek.

Your family give you the slip because you love watching Star Trek so much that its really peeving them off. You tell them Resistance IS Futile!



Your girlfriend beat you because she discovered your private stash of love letters written to Jeri Ryan in Star Trek's Voyager.

You turn your attention to the Duras sisters and develop a crush on B'Etor, who is'nt half bad for a Klingon. Your girlfriend is suspicious now.

You start believing aliens will invade earth and will spread universal peace to every corner of our little world.

You have no life.

Klingons are fearless while Earthies react to fear which is the most foreboding of emotions and makes us look like softies. If only your teeth were spikey and you carried a great knowledge of Klingon swear words.....Then you could scare the blazes out of your opponents....



Its urgent you defend Earth from kamikaze madmen except you require a starship to beam them up for Neural Neutralizer treatment. Now, where is the nearest starship?

Folks smile at you and give you that special glazed look in their eyes when you explain the existence of Star Treks Prime Directive to them.

NASA are a long way off to building a proper warpdrive galaxy class starship which is'nt funny anymore. Maybe its time you built it for them.







You feel terrified for the crew of the USS Enterprise, Defiant, Voyager or deep space nine when our defenders of the galaxy are in danger. You share their pain and rejoice in meeting new lifeforms.

Live Long and Prosper, Trekkies.

Asteroid Space Trek

The year is 2364. In the murky darkness of space and time, several shadows flicker directly ahead of Uss Enterprise-D's flightpath. The bridge viewscreen crackles with static. Riker stops short and looks at Worf for answers. The Klingon growls and thumps his Tactical Station in sheer frustration. Captain Picard gets up from his command chair sighing heavily.

The burdens of command and over 1000 enterprise crew are on his mind. Engineering is getting unusual readings from the long range and short range sensors. In fact the eyes of the Enterprise have been completely disabled owing to heavy radiation escaping from a nearby nebula.

"Captain, we're on a direct collision course with several space objects!"  states the android Data rather calmly. Beads of sweat roll down the captains face.
"All hands battle stations, brace for impact." bawls Picard.
"But Captain why don't we just phaser our way through?." suggests Worf.
"No Mr Worf, thats a bad idea." retorts Picard drumming his fingers nervously.
"No-one ever listens to me" mutters worf through gritted teeth.
Red Alert, Shields up. Computer alter course, bearing 270 mark 15."
"Unable to comply."
Deanna shifts uneasily leaning over to face Picard. Her soft olive skin is white with worry. "Hey lover, we need to get out of here now."
Picard throws his hands up in the air. "My quarters?"
Deanna flashes her sexy smile as all hell breaks loose. "Lets go"


Image Owner/Creater: Paramount Pictures and/or CBS Studios.

Stray asteroids from Jupiters space belt smash into the starboard side of the ship ripping through Transporter Room 2, obliterating everything and everyone on deck 6. The emergency bulkheads and forcefields immediately seal off the affected area.

The plasma injection phase-synchronization software systems crash during the collision causing a massive over load in the warp engines. Chief Engineer La Forge orders an emergency warp core shutdown in an attempt to keep the plasma injectors from seizing up..

The ship shudders and yawns unnaturally, throwing everyone off their feet. Wonderful crunching noises of titanium and pieces of asteroids rip into Shuttle Deck 3 killing all the shuttlebay crewhands. The Enterprise is severely wounded and takes another direct hit on her Engineering hull. .

"Merde....MY SHIP... what in great space is happening down there La Forge. We can't see a damn thing up here."
"I'm on it Captain, just give me two minutes." replies Geordi tapping his com badge.
"We don't have two minutes, I need warp power now." yells the captain staring into his chairs intercom.
"Captain, I've just shut down the warpcore to prevent the plasma injectors reaching meltdown and causing a warpcore breach." reports La Forge above the mayhem in Engineering. Picard glances at a frozen Commander Riker for suggestions. Suddenly the deckplates crumple like tissue paper under Rikers feet..... A terrifying jagged crack splinters across the viewscreen. Its only a matter of time.

Riker is sucked off his feet first, "Data, somethings got me! agghhhhh!'

Panic stricken crew members terrorized out of their minds scream out agonized deaths as flailing bodies shoot across the bridge like cannon balls. Data watches his colleagues zipping through the air, unsettled by their sudden departure.
"Geordi, we've lost structural integrity, divert impulse power to the deflector array now or the entire bridgecrew will die." states the andoid rather calmly.



At the push of a button Geordi re-routes impulse power to the deflector dish but its too little too late. The optical data network crashes momentarily freezing the Enterprises navigation and processing speed times. Engineers grab their tool kits and scramble like mice up the jeffries tubes with orders to redirect every available scrap of energy to the anti photon generators.

STARFLEET NEEDS YOU!

That means you mister, now get going and don't forget your tricorder in case you run into trouble along the way. Reports are coming in with casualties from all over the ship. The Enterprise can't take it anymore and is drifting in space. Shields are down and your tricorder readings clearly identify enemy pirate ships in the vicinity swooping in to loot the Enterprise which is suffering from primary and secondary system failures with malfunctioning phasers. Torpedoes are offline and the use of forcefields have been deployed to suppress fires in the secondary hull.

THE NEEDS OF THE MANY OUTWEIGH THE NEEDS OF THE FEW.

"Attention, this is the Captain. I need hardly remind you that the lives and safety of the Enterprise are at stake. We've been hit by a series asteroids and have temporarily lost power but I know you are the finest crew in Starfleet. Defend the ship and set your phasers on stun. Fight hand to hand combat if necessary. Picard out." A bewildered crew state helplessly at their guns.
It could be just a matter of minutes or seconds before space pirates send their henchmen beaming aboard.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO AND WHY DID PICARD GIVE SUCH AN UNUSUAL ORDER?

Its your Starfleet duty to protect, serve and defend the Enterprise, right!! You've got to take action and not give in to fear. Just don't panic is all I'm saying..... You can do this. The Enterprise needs you.



First, Identify and isolate whatever problem tour faced with. Getting the phaser emitters online would be a good idea. Over 41% of them are fried circuits. To complicate matters, tricorders are giving off strange readings owing to sporadic nebula radiation leaking through the hull. You take out your Enterprise-D Schematic and locate the problem systems illustrated on your backup ipad. Suddenly the klingon Worf appears geared for war. He's carrying his bat'leth with him and its soaked in blood.

"I caught two intruders on deck 15. Remember Ensign, when you need fiber optic cabling to make repairs you can get it from here." roars the klingon as he rips cabling from the ceiling with one hand firing it on the deckplates. But thats Worf for you. 

First things first, you must navigate your way to the required system failure using the correct co-ordinates provided. Flipping open your tricorder and taking readings is the easy part. Fixing the damaged Phaser Emitter Element is quite another matter because the entire section C deck is flooded with nebula radiation. You will have to think outside the box. The ship's in grave danger and time is of the essence. Geordi's hasn't given you a moments peace and orders you to go enter section c. No time to suit up, its now or never.. Hey, I know why don't we send Wesley up the crawlway!!!  Sounds like a great idea, doesn't it. Theres 14 system failures to check out!! He'll never make it back alive. 



Have you got what it takes to join Starfleet? 

Enlist Today!   

Star Trek The Next Generation. U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701-D.

To roll in with some cosmic fun, I've selected a poster from Star Trek's The Next Generation with the USS Enterprise NCC-1701-D. In 2363 the Flagship of the Federation launched from Utopia Planitia Yards oribiting Mars. It was an exciting moment for Starfleet's Core of Engineers so I thought it worth mentioning. She was the finest in the fleet. The Federation's U.S.S. Enterprise 1701-D Galaxy Class flagship rose into the heavens. Fully equipped with her 42 decks gleaming, Dr Leah Brahm's warp-drive engines, a dilithium regulation chamber, lcars interface software, 3 computer cores, sensor arrays, 20 transporter systems, weapons, sickbay, 185 officers, 252 civilian families, crew quarters for 575 enlisted crew, and facilities for off duty personnel.  The Enterprises powerful warp drive was ready to explore the stars.

She had a life expectancy of one hundred years. Thats right 100 Years! Take notes ubber trekkies and then good old Commander William T. Riker got a shot at the Captain's Chair and slammed the USS Enterprise-D into Veridan III, scaring the wits out of poor Counselor Deanna Troi. Blackbeard ruined the Enterprise! Only Commander Data had enough brains to level the descent of the saucer section out but Riker......should be shot..

It takes strength of mind to captain all this 24th century technology and that honour definitely goes to Captain Jean Luc Picard. Congratulations "Mon Capitan." now have a heart and save me from the Calamarain. Still I have to ask you Jean Luc, how could you leave the Enterprise in the lurch with Riker in command of the Bridge? How could you let his happen, Picard?  Even Q's baffled.

This blueprint of old baldy's flagship gives an interesting skeletel layout of the midsection of the Enterprise's secondary hull, saucer section and starboard nacelle. Unfortunately neither the captain's yacht or the warp-core ejection hatch is visible underneath the belly of the ship. But hey! who going to use them? especially with Riker in the Captain's chair and the Enterprise at Red Alert. You can count on it the ship is going down!

Using the chart, the Enterprise's Computer/Data Systems, Command/Facility Systems, Engine/Propulsion Systems, Tactical/Defense Systems, and Navigation/Transporter Systems are all easily detected using the poster's number color codes. So you'd better start learning where everything is and how they operate because your very life may depend upon them.



A rundown of the Enterprise's Warp Propulsion Systems, Impulse Propulsion Systems, Transporter Systems, Ship Duration, Communications Network, Sensor Systems, Tactical Systems are included with some fascinating starship specifications and are required learning for all Starfleet cadets.


For days, the trekkie inside me has been on a flight to another world. But time out. Whats that I hear? Its a little trekkie voice just crying out begging me to share my latest discovery with you. In the lower right hand corner of my Enterprise-D poster in tiny writing reads gbeye.com



Live Long and Prosper.